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Grant: Special Ops (Shifters Elite Book 6) Page 4
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“I’m not the one who was about to bare fangs,” she laughed shakily.
I could just about hear her heart pounding and guilt pierced my heart.
“Sorry. Just one of those things now.” I looked around. “What’s up? What did you want?”
“Like I said, just to check on you.” She gestured behind her. “You didn’t look happy to see those two. I was worried for you.”
“You don’t have to worry about me, you know.”
“Says the man who almost jumped out of his skin because he heard me walking behind him.”
I bristled. “All right. But let me know how you react after spending a year in a lab—”
She gasped over me. “A year?”
I nodded. “So they tell me.”
“My God.”
“I know, right? Imagine hearing something like that. Losing a whole year. I don’t even know who won the World Series.”
She snorted. “You’re talking to the wrong person about that. Sorry.”
We started walking together—slowly. Like she sensed that I wasn’t in a hurry to get back to the rest of them. She was good at that, and at calming me down. I didn’t feel half as agitated as I had when I first walked into the dark, cool woods.
She cleared her throat after a while. “I guess you’ll be going back with them, then.”
She caught me off-guard.
I hadn’t expected her to bring that up. Or to sound so sad when she did.
I looked at her of the corner of my eye. “I don’t know.”
“You don’t?” She sounded stunned. Maybe happy, even.
“I don’t. Why?”
“I… I don’t know,” she sputtered. “I mean, I figured you would be happy to get back to your own clan. Those two looked so happy to see you—it’s obvious they care. A whole year went by, but they were still looking for you.”
“True.”
“Did something bad happen back there? You never did tell me why you were traveling—was it a vacation, or were you just trying to get away from them?”
“Wow. That’s a loaded question.”
She had no idea how uncomfortable it made me, and there was no reason why she should. But somehow, she had a way of reaching into my head and pulling out the things I wanted to hide.
“Which I’m guessing doesn’t have an easy answer, or else you would’ve told me I was way off-base,” she murmured.
“Stop being so smart for a minute. Give a guy a break.” I wasn’t mad. I wasn’t even annoyed. If anything, I wanted to tell her more. I was tired of keeping everything bottled up inside. The pressure would break me if I didn’t release it. I would explode from the inside out.
“You don’t have to tell me anything you don’t want to tell. You know that, right?” She stopped walking and touched my arm. I stopped and turned to her.
“Yeah. I do. But I have to tell somebody or I’ll go nuts.” I took a deep breath and hoped I wasn’t making a huge mistake.
6
DANIELA
I took a deep breath and wished my heart would stop racing. So he trusted me. Big deal. It didn’t mean we were getting married or anything.
But when he looked at me the way he was and his whole heart was open and exposed, I couldn’t help but feel a little thrill. He trusted me with something big. It had to mean something.
“If it’ll make you feel better, you can tell me. I want to help, if I can.”
One corner of his mouth quirked up in a little smile. “You sure you’re not insanely curious? I mean, I’m sorta building this up pretty big.”
I hoped it was dark enough that he couldn’t see me blushing. “Stop kidding around. I’m not like that.”
“No, you’re not.” He turned serious again. “Come on. Let’s sit by the lake. It’s getting creepy in here.”
I led the way out into the open, away from the edge of the lake, and sat on an old, weathered log.
The sunlight had that strange late-day quality that turned everything to copper, and it turned his hair to gold. I could’ve watched him forever, just standing there at the water’s edge with his back to me. Every movement made the sunlight flicker and dance through his golden mane.
“Promise you’ll keep this to yourself?” he asked, turning his head slightly so I got a look at his full profile—the strong chin and jaw, the straight nose, the smooth brow.
“Of course.”
“You can’t even tell Layla.”
“I won’t.”
He nodded and turned away again. “I’m not sure I can go home.”
Why did my heart skip a beat when he said that? I told myself to get a grip, that I shouldn’t be happy over him not wanting to go or being unable to go. It wasn’t a good thing for him. I needed to keep his needs in mind—we were friends, and he was hurting or scared, and I should’ve cared more about that than about my selfish need to keep him around.
“Why not?” I asked when he didn’t continue.
“When I left my clan to travel to Chicago… it wasn’t because I wanted to help the clan. I was doing it to help myself.”
“How could you help yourself?” I thought he might’ve meant he was trying to get in good with his boss, kiss a little butt. But that wouldn’t explain a fear of going back.
His shoulders rose and fell as he took a deep breath. “I was on a fact finding mission. For our enemy.”
My blood went cold.
That didn’t make sense. It didn’t match up with the mental image I had of him at all. I thought he was noble, honest, brave. How naïve could I be? Was I still a little girl, reading fairy tales before going to sleep? I didn’t know anything about him. I had only wanted to believe I did.
“You’re very quiet,” he observed, and his voice was soft. Sad.
“I don’t know what to say,” I whispered.
“I didn’t expect you to. I guess this ruins your opinion of me, huh?” He turned a little so he could look at me over his shoulder.
His voice.
It just about broke my heart.
He sounded like a little boy who knew he was going to get in trouble and was just waiting for his punishment.
“I don’t understand, is all,” I said. I had to choose my words carefully. I had earned his trust and I wanted to keep it that way.
“I’ll make it easier for you.” His large hands clasped behind his back. “The leader of our enemy clan—Bradford—was blackmailing me. He would tell Vincent what he knew if I didn’t do what he wanted.”
He didn’t want to spy on his clan—but there was something bad enough in his past that he could be blackmailed. I wasn’t sure if this made me feel much better. “You were his spy, then.”
“You could say that. He wanted to know how many of our members from the Midwest were coming to Florida, what their names were, whether they had any weaknesses—including the names and locations of their mates, if there were any.”
“Oh, God.” Bile rose in my throat and made me grimace.
“Obviously, I didn’t want to do it. I mean, it was against everything I believed. I might not have known the guys personally, but they were my blood, just the same. Hell, even if they weren’t, it meant maybe killing them or the people they loved, and I couldn’t stand knowing I would get innocent people killed just because he wanted leverage.”
“What did you do?” I was breathless, hoping he would say he ran away.
“I went to Chicago.” He shrugged. “After several sleepless nights, I knew I didn’t have a choice.”
It was like a punch to the stomach. “What did he have on you?” I whispered. I wasn’t sure I wanted to know, but I had to ask.
“That’s another story. I don’t feel comfortable getting into that right now. Sorry.”
“Don’t be sorry,” I said, without thinking about it, more out of reflex than anything else. “It’s not my business, anyway.”
“I never had the chance to tell him anything, by the way. I want you to know that. I never helped him.”r />
“But… it was because you were kidnapped. Right?”
He flinched. “Yes. Because they kidnapped me.”
“How did it happen?”
“Oldest story in the book,” he said, sounding rueful. Almost laughing at himself. “I went hunting alone in an area I wasn’t familiar with. When I heard their footsteps, I didn’t know where to run to get away. I trapped myself against the side of an old rock wall that was too high to jump.” His hands closed into tight fists. “I guess they saved me, in a way. I didn’t have to sell my soul.”
He bent down to pick up a few small rocks, which he skimmed along the surface of the otherwise still lake.
I watched them bounce, and each bounce created a ripple which collided with the other ripples until that was all there was, ripples in all directions, spreading as far as the eye could see.
“I had an entire year to beat myself up over it,” he muttered when he was out of rocks. “And I did. Every fucking day, I cursed myself for not standing up to him when he gave me that ultimatum. I didn’t have to go. I could’ve shown a little backbone, a little integrity. I could’ve challenged him to tell the clan what he knew about me—if I had called his bluff, he probably would’ve gone ahead with it, but at least I could’ve lived with myself. Maybe. I don’t know. But it would’ve been better than feeling like a traitor and being locked up because of it. Somebody’s living experiment. I deserved everything I got.”
I had to speak up when I heard that. Listening to him beating up
on himself was too much to sit through without saying something. “Don’t punish yourself like that!”
“Why not? I deserve it, Daniela. And I’m not trying to get sympathy—honestly, I don’t expect you to feel sorry for me.”
“I won’t hate you, either, if that’s what you’re trying to get me to do.”
“No, I don’t want you to do that, either,” he murmured softly.
I got up from the log and went to him. “Look. You did more than pay the price for taking that trip. And maybe that was the price you had to pay. I don’t know. I don’t guide the Universe or anything like that—ask Layla about that sort of thing. It’s not my specialty. But I’ll tell you this: you’re a good person. I can feel it, and I’m very good at reading people. That ass had you in a corner, and he used you. He sounds like a terrible person. Evil, really.”
“He was. He’s dead now.”
“Good! He deserved whatever happened to him.” I couldn’t believe how worked up I was—heart pounding, breathing heavy, blood pumping so fast it made my head hurt.
I wanted to bring the bastard back to life so I could kill him myself. When I imagined Grant cornered, in pain, unable to sleep because he couldn’t figure out what to do…
Tied down to a metal cot with a line in his arm, getting pumped full of drugs that changed who he was…
I couldn’t help myself. I reached up, turned his face to mine with both hands, and stood on tiptoe so I could brush my lips against his. It was a gentle, tentative kiss and I was scared to death that he would push me away but I couldn’t help myself. I had to show him that I understood what he did and that I didn’t judge him for it.
He didn’t pull away. Instead, he slid his arms around my waist and pulled me in until my body was pressed against his. The rapid beat of his heart matched mine as my arms closed around his neck. I couldn’t believe it—it wasn’t all in my head. He wanted me, too. Or at least, he needed the little bit of comfort I was able to give him in that moment. It would have to be enough. I ran my fingers through his hair and heard the soft groan in the back of his throat as our mouths moved over each other. When his tongue slid along my lips, a shudder ran through me and I melted against him.
It ended much too soon. He pulled away—not totally, but enough so that the kiss ended. My head spun. I leaned against him, my forehead to his shoulder. “I’m sorry,” he whispered between gasps for air.
“You don’t have to be,” I whispered back. “I started it.”
“Yeah, but I shouldn’t have let you. I know you’re just trying to make me feel better.”
I looked up at him.
His eyes seemed even darker than usual. Like the shade of blue the sky turned to just before it got dark.
I grimaced. “No. That’s not it. Don’t you know how much I’ve been wanting to do that? Or do you think I tag along in the dark after every shifter I meet?”
He snorted gently, grinning. “Even though you know what I did?”
“I know you had your reasons, whatever they were.” I hated to think of what would be bad enough for him to betray his clan or even consider doing it, but that wasn’t my place.
He would tell me when the time came, and we could deal with it then. For the time being, I was still in his arms and everything I didn’t even know I wanted was coming true. And I wouldn’t ruin it.
I rested one hand on his chest and felt the sure, steady beat underneath my palm. “I trust this. I believe this is good.”
His eyes searched my face. “Are you even real?”
“You’re the one with his arms around me. What do you think?”
They tightened ever so slightly and I smiled just before he lowered his head again…
Footsteps crashing through the woods broke the magic of the moment, and he let me go just before Layla broke through the line of trees.
“There you are! Jace said something about you bringing wood for the fire pit? I was scared to death when you didn’t come back!”
I glared at her with my hands on my hips. “So you came looking for him all by yourself? Not a smart move, lady.”
“Oh. Yeah. I guess you’re right.” She blushed as he walked past on his way to gather wood.
I saw right through her, but waited until he was out of earshot.
“You are such a little sneak!” I hissed.
She blushed harder and bit hard on her bottom lip. “What do you mean?”
“I mean you’re a terrible liar, for one thing, and I know you wanted to see what we were doing!”
She shrugged. “Hey, I didn’t see anything.” She reached for me, and the thumb she swiped over my cheek came back pink and shiny. “Your lip gloss is smeared, by the way. And the twigs and branches Grant picks up won’t be the only wood he’s carrying. Just sayin’. I think it’ll take a minute for him to, uh, calm down.”
It was my turn to blush furiously… even though I couldn’t help giggling a little, no matter how hard I tried not to. I was too damn happy to hold it in.
Her laugh rang out. “Don’t worry. Your secret’s safe with me.” She took me by the hand and led me back to camp while my mind spun and I wondered what would’ve happened if she didn’t interrupt us.
7
GRANT
I couldn’t stop watching Daniela. Whenever she moved, no matter what she was doing, my eyes wanted to follow her and memorize everything. The way she smiled. The way her hair swayed when she shook her head, showing off the colors underneath the top layer of blonde.
Everything about her was special. Even the way her tongue darted out to lick a little bit of sauce off the corner of her mouth.
Lust uncoiled deep inside my core and I didn’t realize I had unconsciously licked my lips until I tasted the little bit of sauce left on them from the meat I had just eaten.
Her eyes found mine, like she felt me watching, and she smiled before ducking her head. Shy, maybe a little flirtatious.
I imagined throwing her over my shoulder and charging into my tent with her. Not letting her leave until the sun came up, doing all sorts of things to her…
“So? What do you think?” Jace asked, snapping me to attention.
God damn it, I hadn’t heard a word he said.
“Hmm?”
He looked across the fire pit to the other side, where Daniela chatted with Layla and another one of the girls. A familiar, knowing smile spread across his face. “Ah. Okay. I get it.”
“You don’t get shit,” I mutt
ered, punching his shoulder lightly.
“Right. I guess not.” He rolled his eyes, but let it go. “I was asking when you wanna get rolling out of here. Do you wanna fly back with us? Our flight’s scheduled for tomorrow—we could probably get you on it.”
Just like that, my heart felt like a lead block. “That soon?”
“Hey, it’s up to you,” he said. “I understand if you have, uh, business you need to take care of here.” He tilted his head in Daniela’s direction. “But I do think you should get a move on, too. The sooner you get to a doctor, the easier I’ll sleep at night. I know Dad will feel the same.”
“Yeah. Your dad.”
“I called him earlier,” he said, totally missing the dead sound of my voice. He was too busy being excited. “He’s fucking over the moon happy that you’re here, and you’re—well, in mostly good shape. As good as can be expected. Better, even.”
“Thanks for all the compliments. I don’t know what to say,” I forced a smile.
“You know what I mean. Anyway, he wants to throw a party for you when you get back. Everybody’s gonna want to see you, talk to you, find out what happened.”
“Oh, no.” I held my head in my hands. “Not that.”
“Ah. I see what you mean. Okay, we’ll set a rule: no asking about what happened. They’ll just have to accept that you’re back and be glad. No need to dredge up the specifics of what happened. Sound fair?”
“More than fair,” I admitted, even though I still hated the idea.
A party. For me. The person who least deserved one. But none of them knew that, of course. They didn’t know how close I had come to betraying all of them. Especially Vincent. What would he say if he knew why I left Florida?
Cord called Jace over—he was talking with Lance and some of the other guys about the clans and how they were set up.
I wondered if Lance was thinking about joining up, or even starting his own clan. It made sense, seeing as how the pack was so scattered and unsure. Being part of a clan meant being part of a family, and always knowing someone had your back.
Unless they decided to stab you in it.
Just like that, my mood tanked.